Here’s one of the imaginary Ooh Odd Zoo bonus creatures our readers wanted us to write about: the platyphant!

The Platyphant

Platyphants happen when platypi
and packs of pachyderms pass by

each other in a mall or park
and inside two there is a spark

of longing never felt before,
a tingly feeling called amour.

They turn from their respective herds.
They find each other. They share words

that quickly turn into romance
then wedding bells, then platyphants!

Platyphant fur is ottery,
and since they like things watery

they have webbed feet and tails that slap
(and ears that when they ride bikes, flap).

They’re made of lots of odds and ends,
though in the end aren’t WE, my friends?

Tusk and duckbill, eggshell, stinger,
this, that, and thingamajinger.

We’ve all got bits of the above,
but what we’re really made of’s love.